The Final Chapter!

I got the "All Clear" from my CAT scan the other day! Hurray, hurray! At this point I continue to take my hormone-blocking pills - for 5 years - and just get regular mammogram check-ups.

I quit wearing my wig earlier this month. It just got too hot! I would come in from walking back from my office, in the 95 degree heat, and whip that sucker off! Then, someone would come to the door unexpectedly and I would answer it - totally forgetting that I had "no hair on." It was funny: friends would be looking at me wide-eyed, but not saying anything about it. I would be thinking "What's up with them?" Until I looked in the mirror and thought OH! It's funny how people don't comment on something really obvious.

Here are two latest pictures of my SHORT short hair. I kind of like it. A couple people have said it makes me look younger (which I doubt) or hipper (certainly true). Nancy and I came up with the term "soccer mom" for my look with the wig. I am still holding off going to the stylist, even though it needs even-ing up. They will cut it too much and I'll be back where I was when I didn't have the nerve to wear it.

Not all my hair actually fell out after I got it shaved. Some hairs (maybe 10%) continued to grow. So they were about 1.5 inches longer than the newly grown hair. It was like a Persian cat's guard hairs. I had my daughter go after them with the scissors. I continue to snip hairs that stick out beyond the rest.

The one thing I'm not sure I like about this short hair is that it doesn't balance the rest of my body. I think having bigger hair made my head better match my bigger body. Now I feel like I look like a pin-head. Oh well. I'm on a diet. Both being overweight and drinking alcohol possibly contribute to breast cancer. Not a direct link, but a "more women with these conditions develop breast cancer. "

I still have to get my port out. I had someone ask me the other day, when I was wearing a swim suit, if it was a pace maker! I had sort of forgotten that it was even there, so that was a reminder to go ahead and get that out. It's a last reminder of my year of cancer, anyway. It was just about one year ago that I had the "annual" check up that started this whole thing.

I have my sister Nancy to thank for suggesting I do this blog. I hope it has helped folks keep "abreast" of my situation, treatments, mental states etc. (Sorry for the bad pun - there haven't been enough of them lately!) And now I will sign off. I don't expect to write again. Thanks for reading and caring and being supportive. I couldn't have done this without all of you.

Wow! All done!

It seems amazing that this whole ordeal is OVER, for now! I finished my 7 weeks of radiation yesterday. For the first time in 7 weeks I did not have a 7:45 am appt for radiation. I celebrated by staying home and not taking my kids to school (they can walk or bike, but have been getting a ride since I went right by their schools at 7:30). I stayed home, cleaned house a bit and just had a relaxing morning. Yay!

The radiation did turn out much worse than I was expecting and had heard it would be. For small breasted women it appears the breast tissue doesn't get as burned as us big-breasted sisters. Alas! Although, one of my petite friends said "Well, at long last -- that's my first positive for small breasts!" So, I guess life evens out over the long run.

It turned out that the biggest problem with my radiation was actually a rampant yeast infection under my breast. You may recall I got a yeast infection after the surgery too, and we battled for a diagnosis. I have noticed slight yeast issues in the summer for many years - due to sweat, moisture, darkness, etc. But with the radiation burn the yeasties got out of control, and were the cause of the big raw swath of skin (about the size of a letter envelope). The doctor gave me an anti-fungal cream, a spray and a powder. The cream and spray hurt like spraying myself with an acetylene torch, for several minutes. So, I couldn't bring myself to do THAT very often! It seemed wrong to put powder on such raw flesh, so I didn't use it, either. And the powder hurt, too, just not as much. Finally, I convinced the doctor to give me a prescription and it was cleared up in 3 days!

Always remember: you know a lot about your own chemistry and your own probable causes of symptoms. Be proactive and complain loudly if things aren't going right. Make strong suggestions. I've had to do that with BOTH these yeast infections. I guess yeast must be uncommon so they aren't looking out for it.

Once I cleared up the yeast infection, I was back to "just a sunburn," which was not so bad. Ugly, yes. Think of how ground beef turns gray in the skillet before it turns brown - that was the color of my skin! It is now peeling in gritty little bits and the breast is still fairly red. However, it's been red ever since my second surgery, so I may have a lobster sitting on my chest for a long while. It's also still larger than the other, but already seems to be going down in size some.

Best of all, I can sleep again without waking up in pain! I can turn over without "noticing" which breast I'm leaning on.

As my chemo wears off, some of my body is getting back to normal, as well. This isn't all good, ladies! Would you mind if your armpits didn't smell? How about those annoying little hairs on your chin - would you miss them?? Yes, it's all coming back to me now. Hair on my legs, too. Oddly, the hair on my public bone is not coming back very fast. Looks really weird, let me tell you. I didn't even notice it, since I'm not as slim as I was and don't look THAT closely in my full length mirror very often. My girls noticed it but didn't say anything until I brought it up. Their comment was "Yes, it's very disturbing." (Poor things! They've been troopers!)

And, yes, the hair on my head is coming back! It's now almost as long as Annie Lennox's hair from 1980s ("Who's That Girl?" era, see picture). I'm still keeping the wig but it's nicer to have some hair to see when I get out of the shower, instead of Tom Waits looking back at me in the mirror. (Now THAT'S a shocker!)

For now, I am all done. I go back for a PET scan (the one that specifically finds cancer cells) in about 4 months, I believe. It's been a LONG winter, but in some ways it's gone faster than it ever seemed it could. I thank all my friends and family for supporting me, and reading my blog. I don't know when I'll write again, but I'm going to keep it around and we'll see what comes up.

Now, I'm going to concentrate on summer and having some fun with my family! And I hope you all do too! Enjoy every minute of every day as much as you can, and always laugh when you have the opportunity. Especially at yourself!

Half way through radiation!

I have a total of 33 treatments to do, and I finished the 17th yesterday (Apr 9). Now that I've done 3 weeks worth, the side effects are becoming noticeable. That breast is quite red; looks like a bad sunburn. However, the sunburn line is conveniently below most of my shirt necklines, except for the lowest. Amazing how much cleavage has become fashionable, isn't it? Also amazing how accurate the laser can be.

Worse than just being "colorful," though, is the painful sunburn feeling. It seems strange, but the only place that it is bad is underneath my breast. I can see that it is even darker than the rest of the skin and is very tender to abrasion. However, so far I can't really feel any rubbing when I have a bra on.

I am still taking naps and find that I get tired early if I don't (like about 8:30pm). However, next week I will be in a 40 hr training for Census, so I'll see if I can make it through without crashing. If I do well, I have a chance to be a Crew Leader, which even pays more. However, it would be a 40 hour week, plus the 10 hrs I already work as an admin, with radiation on top. I guess I'll just do what I can and see what happens.

Spring has sprung here in the Grand Valley! My forsythia is a fountain of yellow and I have white and purple hyacinths blooming next to my blue house. Very pretty! The winter of my discomfort is almost over!

The New Wig!

Yes, indeed, I did find a wig and here are some pictures.

I think it reminds me of Martha Stewart. Or Dorothy Hamill 30 years later. It looks as if I have dark hair (which matches my eyebrows) but have lightened the top of it -- perhaps it was going gray on top?? So the roots are darker and the hair along the nape is dark.

I tried on several curly wigs, since my hair is curly, but they all looked "frowzy" and old-fashioned. So, this one is a fairly straight style on top, but it has some curl to it on the sides and the back.

Here's a second picture. (Only look at the wig, there's a very strange look/expression on my face.) You can see the darker underlay better in this one, also hopefully see that the back near the nape is very dark. It's very hip -- doesn't try to look natural at all, just light on top and dark on the bottom.

I love this wig! I think I'm never going to bother to grow my hair out -- I'll just always wear this wig! In the morning I just give it a shake and pull it on. Easier even than my no-fuss hairstyles. Well, I suppose summer swimming with a wig is not recommended. And it will probably be hot once the weather warms up. Anyway, it will do fabulously well for the next couple months.

And, no, I don't wear it all the time. It is a bit tight -- which is a good thing, one doesn't want it falling off or getting askew -- but it gives me a headache after several hours. So, I wear it when I'm going out somewhere other than my radiation appts.

Radiation is still going fine. No soreness. I am taking naps more, but then I always seem to take naps if I don't have work to do in the afternoon. Census work has stopped again for a while but will pick up again in April, we think.

New hair

My hair is just barely beginning to grow in -- about a quarter inch long, except for a few hairs that didn't ever fall out and that are now about an inch long. It looks very strange. All the hair is gray/white -- no dark roots coming up at all. I did still have some dark hair when I started this. Mostly, though, it still looks like scalp with a little fuzz. A peach of a head! :^)

Today I tried to go to the American Cancer Society office after my radiation treatment, because I hear they have a lot of free wigs, but they weren't open that early. Now that it's spring, many of my hats seem odd -- they are decidedly winter hats -- so I'm thinking maybe a wig will be an interesting change. I did get one wig at the Look Good, Feel Better session back in January, but it is platinum blonde and doesn't suit me. The short cut of it looks OK, just too blonde!

My bucket hat still looks cute and spring-y with colorful scarves. And there ARE nice spring hats, but I'm not sure I feel like buying any since I never wore hats before. A free wig sounds like a good spring solution, although they are hot and I may decide by summer that ball caps are perfectly fine. I always abhorred ball caps before, not sure why. Too "masculine" I guess, just like I never liked polo shirts. My personality is already masculine enough (strong, loud, intelligent, pushy) that I guess I compensate by wearing more feminine clothes. Huh, I never thought about that before!

Happy Spring!

"Half No-Time"

That's a quote from Alice in Wonderland, one of my favorite books. I'm referring to the length of the radiation blasts. It is literally 15 seconds in each of 2 positions. Amazing that such a little thing can have any effect at all.

The whole process from start to finish is less than 15 minutes. I am the first appointment of the day at 7:45am, and they are not even ready for me most times. I drive from dropping K&L off at school directly to the Cancer Center, which is only blocks away. I remove my clothes from the waist up, put on a gown and wait for the technicians to be ready. I guess the folks before me have always been late -- the technicians seem surprised when I am ready and waiting at 7:45.

In the radiation room I lie on my back on the plank, with my head and arms in the molded "pillow" we made before. The two technicians take a little time lining me up and then leave the room. I stay for two 15 second blasts from the radiation machine, and then it's over and I'm off to dress.

The machine is very cool; it's shaped like a big sweater shaver. It has a big circular, flat head about 2 feet across, on an arm that comes up from under the bed. The whole thing revolves around me. The first position is about "2 o'clock," about 2 feet from my head. Then it rotates around to about "8 o'clock" under the bed for the second blast.

I don't feel a thing. It isn't scary or even nerve-wracking. There are green lines of light that I guess are used to make sure things are lined up correctly. The head of the machine is a glass plate with the green lines making cross-hairs. I look at that for a while. Then I tend to close my eyes - I don't know why. Makes the time pass more comfortably, I guess.

Last week I had the first 2 sessions of 32 sessions total - 6 & 1/2 weeks of 5 days a week. I don't feel any effects yet. I have been taking naps, but I'm not sure that's related. Tiredness is the most common side effect people have told me.

Yesterday the girls and I went on a geocache hike in honor of the Spring equinox, with some other UU folks. I felt out of shape and my knee is still bothering me, but other than that I felt fine. It was a nice easy hike up to a view of the whole Grand Valley, Grand Mesa, Bookcliffs and the Colorado Monument. Hurray -- winter is over and I am recovering!

Look, Ma! My first tattoos!

My first appointment for radiation was to make sure they could easily "line me up" for the radiation lasers. So, I lie down on CT scan "bed", which is a hard, narrow plank really. They put a molding pillow under my head and I put my arms over my head, also sinking them into the pillow. The pillow is then hardened so it will exactly fit the shape my head and arms, so I can get into the right position more easily.

Next the technicians look through their viewers to make sure my left breast is where they want it to be for the laser. After moving me slightly around and making everything perfect, they put 3 tattoos on me. One in the middle of my breasts and one on each side in my arm pits. Unfortunately, they wouldn't do a flower or even a little star... ;^) Actually, the tattoos look pretty much like some of the freckles/moles on my arms. About the size of a pencil lead and dark. They tattoo them on so that they won't wash off over the next 7 weeks. I also get a lecture about not using anything on the skin of my breast except for the cream they give me. No deodorant or hand lotion.

I will start next Wednesday (3/17 -- luck of the Irish be with me!) with a "simulation" where I do through a dry run to make sure everything lines up and the radiation plan the doctor designs is right. Then the real thing the next day at 7:45am and every weekday thereafter for 6.5 weeks. So I should be done by April 30. I'm glad I got the 7:45 time, because then I can drop the girls off at school, head for radiation, and get on with my day by 8:15 or so. The actual radiation is only 15 minutes, so with undressing and dressing again, maybe a half hour each day.

They also warned me about the possible side effects, which the radiation oncologist has said may be worse for me because my breasts are large. Maybe that means they give me more radiation, but I'm not sure. It sounds like a mild to severe sunburn: redness, itching, possibly peeling, hopefully not really severe skin disintegration, like some people on the web have reported. There will also be tiredness, probably starting after a couple weeks, that increases with more treatments.

I'm planning to be pretty much OK for 4 weeks, then I'll only have 2.5 weeks to go. Doesn't sound too bad. Of course, as you all know, I'm an optimist. But also strong and with big energy reserves. And I always have the last resort: I know that eventually I will be done with all this and all I really have to do is wait and it will be over.

Please Don't Tell Me / Remind Me of "The Bad Outcomes"

I know that people like to relate to what you are going through by comparing it to what they, their friends/family, acquaintances have gone through. But, PLEASE PLEASE don't tell me the "bad news" from their experiences.

It doesn't help me to hear about how someone you know, young and strong, died of breast cancer. It doesn't make my days easier to be reminded that it will be in my 6 month check-up that I will see if any cancer has come back again. My job is to stay as positive and up-beat as possible, and if a little lack of foresight or rosy-thinking accomplishes that, then please leave me to it. I don't need reality-training; I don't even need to be planning ahead.

It seems like I would not have to say this, but apparently I do. I don't want to hear about the bad outcomes. It feels rude of me to tell them that, so, please mention it to others you know that I know. Thanks for your help. And all your help!

Final Chemo Treatment Done! YAY!

I had my last of 4 chemo treatments last week. It went well, no problems. The allergic reaction that I suffered since the 3rd treatment seems to be really subsided -- I haven't had to take a Benedryl for a week. I spent this weekend relaxing, although the "down days" seemed a little less severe than previous treatment weekends. Maybe because I just had to do more and so couldn't shut down as much. Ah, the trials of being a single parent and going through chemo. Life doesn't stop just because you have cancer!

So, now I still have to make sure I'm "OK" - I go in for a 10 day check-up for blood work. Then a final sign-off from the medical oncology (chemo) doctor. Then I need to talk to the radiation doctor to start radiation. I gather they want to start that about 3 weeks after my last chemo, so basically that will be the same schedule as before.

From what I was told before, radiation is a long, frequent course of short treatments. So, I will have to go in 5 days a week for 7 weeks! I am hoping that I can arrange it so that I drop the kids off to school at 7:30am, then go in for a treatment. Then I have the rest of the day to work, etc. The after-effects that have been reported to me vary from some tiredness to burns. The radiation will be only over my breast area, but I think it will be both breasts because the original cancer site was close to my chest wall and hard to 'get at' for the single-breast treatment.

I'll know more after I meet again with the radiation oncologist. I am hoping to put off the start date of the radiation a week so I can get out of town for even just a little time with the girls. It is the week of their spring break and before this next course of treatment starts it would be nice to have a little "normal" time. We need it!

So, thanks for sticking with me through the first course. I guess I've actually have 2 sets of treatments now: the surgeries and recoveries, and now the chemo. Radiation and then the hormone therapy to go, I think. One treatment at a time, is all I can really think about.

A Cautionary Tale of Overdoing

There will be 2 posts today, one from experiences a while ago and another one from my recent -- and final! -- chemo treatment. This one is about the error of thinking "you are fine" when you're going through treatments.

A week after my 3rd treatment, I had a friend come into town who I haven't seen in about 20 years. Well, I was on the mend from the treatment and of course I always think I'm just "perfectly fine" except for the week right after treatment. So, I overdid. And man, did it make me pay!

For starters, I went out to eat and ate things I shouldn't, like spicy food and a beer or two. Then I stayed up a little late. Then I shoveled a big, wet snow from my LONG sidewalk. And the final straw, I decided that since these hemorrhoids which were acting up from the spicy food were not letting me get a good night's sleep, I would take 2 Percoset and go to bed. Along with a Zofran anti-nausea drug because the Percoset sometimes upset my stomach.

Now, I have taken Percoset after my surgeries and had no trouble with it at all. And I have taken the Zofran, too. But whether because Percoset (codeine + acetaminaphen) is strong, or because of a drug interaction, or (most likely) because my body is just in a reduced state, I had a HUGE allergic reaction.

HUGE - Like raised hives and terrible itching under my breasts, down my hips, groin and thighs. Like painful and itchy swelling in my hands, knees and finally even the bottoms of my feet and my face. Like waking up in the middle of the night going crazy with itching, to pace around the house itching, trying not to itch, putting on ice packs and chanting nonsense to keep my mind off it. Totally miserable. (But no trouble breathing, which is the truly scary reaction.)

The doctor prescribed some steroids, which didn't seem to help at all. Benedryl (capsules and cream), prescription anti-hemorrhoid suppositories (now those actually work!), other kinds of skin sprays & creams, nothing seemed to help that much, except just the time for whatever it was to work its way out of my system. Took about a week to get to small, reasonable outbreaks.

Even 3 weeks later, I still get little rashes on my hands, knees, arms, face, and take some more Benedryl capsules. They go away with a little Benedryl. I was quite worried about the next chemo, but it didn't aggravate it any further.

So, if you are finding this post, and you are one of those people going through cancer treatment who recovers fast and thinks "this really isn't so bad" -- don't be fooled! Your body is being very nice to you and don't take it for granted! Things can go very wrong, very quickly when you're body is compromised as it has to be when doing chemo! Rest, sleep, eat right, keep in mind that you are recovering from some dangerous chemicals in your body.

What are chemo "down days" like?

People always want to know the nasty details and I've been sparing of them. But, now I'll 'fess up.

It feels just like you've been poisoned, I guess. Starting on Friday and lasting about 5 days I feel very weak and shaky. My eyeballs seem to jump around and when I close my eyes they are still jumping around. If I do much work (typing, collecting dog poop from the frozen backyard) I just feel like sitting down for a while. My mind doesn't seem to work too well and doesn't want to do anything very difficult. I find myself thinking "Oh well, I'll deal with that later. I'll fix that later. I'll find that later."

On Saturday, which is the worst day if the chemo was on Wednesday (which seems to be my schedule for the last 3), I wake up around the usual time, about 7:30am, after having woken up about 7 times in the night to go to the bathroom. (They encourage you to drink as much water as possible to help flush out the chemo drugs as fast as possible.) I get up, go to the bathroom once again and wander into the kitchen. Drink more water because my mouth tastes like old metal and I'm thirsty and my stomach hurts. Think about eating. Not very interested but I eat a bit of bagel to get some carb in my stomach to help the acid and hurt.

Go back to bed because I can't think of anything I have the interest or strength to do and the girls aren't up yet anyway (you remember teenagers and weekends...).

Wake up again about 10:30am. The girls are now up so I get up and we have breakfast. I can eat; I don't have any nausea. The food doesn't taste good particularly, but eating makes my stomach feel better. We hang out about an hour -- once they go upstairs to do whatever they do up there (probably go online or play a video game or read), I go back to bed again. Basically my whole day is sleeping, getting up to pee, and the occasional hour awake. I go back to bed for "the night" about 8pm. It's difficult to sleep because of all the sleep I've gotten and all the peeing. But I still sleep most of the night.

The Friday before and the Sunday, Monday & Tues after are not quite as bad. Still feel weak and some shaky, stomach still hurts. My mouth still tastes like old metal. But I can do the things I need to do -- go to work and type, think, decide. Drive the girls around. Warm up food and eat with the girls. But I go to bed early and usually take an afternoon nap.

There. Not as bad as I thought it might be. Probably not as bad as you feared. My friend who has done chemo and I call it "feeling puny." Not really terrible, just unable to DO anything.

I have wondered whether having my worst day be Saturday is "real" or if it is the day that is convenient to "take a day off." Some people have other days that are worst, between 1 and 5 days after chemo. I do think it helps to have "scheduled" this time for myself, when I don't plan to do anything, or go anywhere and can just sleep, watch TV, read, etc. Maybe I'll continue to schedule these down days every 3 weeks, even after I stop chemo! I suppose, in some ways, we all do that, whether we are conscious of it or not.

OK - the bald pictures! View at your own risk!

And don't let my daughter see!

Jean Luc Piccard anyone? (Mom, that's from some newer StarTrek that I don't think I ever watched a whole episode of.)

I think it really emphasizes my new wrinkles. Well, they were there forming before, but I do think the last 3 months have accentuated them.

You can see the port scars, there's the longer one right above the actual port and the smaller one up and to the left. You can't really see the port itself. Well, a bit in the first picture, right under the bigger scar you can see it is a bit raised. There are 3 little nubs underneath the skin, so the nurse knows right where to poke. It is about an inch in diameter, I guess.

In case you've been wondering, I did have my daughter take some of the earlier ones, but it's difficult to catch her when I'm ready. So, then I started taking them myself with a mirror in front of me so I can look in the viewfinder. I feel pretty proud! Also finally got L. to show me how to upload the picture myself, since she never seems to get around to it. Maybe I'll even get those videos posted from the girls play and award ceremony that I promised last year!

More hats

I guess I can only get 6 to a page. I have four more to go.

I'm never sure where these are going to show up on the page, or where the text is going to go.

Right is my black hat over a pink sleep cap. The black hat doesn't show up too well. I even tried to lighten it up some.

Left is my llama hat, a gift from a friend who said it didn't look good on her. I think its cute as can be and I gather from looking at young things that black, cream and brown are quite in fashion. Not that I would know.

Looking silly so you can see my poinsietta pin for Christmas -- its not a red palm tree! (And that's a snowman on my shirt.)

Me looking a bit classic with a black hat over the white sleep hat.

MaryAnne With Hats (may take a long time to load?)

I have been told that I have a good head for hats. And lately I've been told that I am really "stylin'" !! I am not angry in this picture, really, but trying to let you see the side of the hat, which has a funky tie in the blue scarf. The light blue underneath is one of my sleep hats.

This is a rather strange kerchief-type hat that a friend gave me. Luckily, it perfectly matches this shirt!
This and the next are my favorite - my "bucket hat." That's what the website called it that sold it. Very simple, matches my jeans, works with scarves, sleep hats underneath, no hat underneath, with pins, by itself, etc.
Showing off my very Accot bow in back.
A hat given to me by a friend, but not a real cancer hat. It's not big enough, really. It is a pin-stripe fedora, although it doesn't show off too well in this picture, even after I lightened it.
I look very -- what? Like a 1940s matron or something. This is my wool cloche hat with big scarf as band.

3rd Chemo Down, only 1 left!

3rd treatment was yesterday (Jan 20), which means I had that nasty shot today. I am feeling tired and noticing the bones a bit more than last time. Last time I shelled out the big bucks for real Clariton, but this time I got the generic. Oh well. Some Exedrin PM should take care of me tonight I hope. So far I don't think this one is worse, although many people told me to expect it and round 4 to be worse than the first 2 were. Of course, this is only the 2nd day, pretty early in my chemo reaction cycle.

I expect to be pretty tired and out of it for a few days til about Sunday, and then mostly normal but stomach problems, until about Wednesday the 27th. It's only about a week of any complaint, then I'm pretty much back to normal.

It's amazing to me that I'm already this far along! Seems like I'm always complaining that time speeds by, but sometimes it's a good thing!

By the way, I am going to put up some pictures of me in some of my hats and scarves, just so folks can see me! But then, on its own blog post, I am going to put up the pictures of my bald head and you can see my chest port too. (Nothing risque.) I'm warning you now, so that you can avoid those pictures of my bald head if you want to. I know it upsets some people, like my daughter, who still hasn't seen me without me at least wearing my little sleep caps.

2nd Chemo was Dec 30 -- Not as bad as last time

I went in for an afternoon appt this time and boy was it crowded! They were closing early Dec 31 and closed Jan 1, so they had to get us all scheduled and through our treatments before that. I got there about 1:30 and was ready to get a chair by 2:30. (They first have to draw blood and make sure you are "well enough" for them to try to kill you again.)

Well, there was no room at the Inn! The nurse suggested I go get my next appts set up and make myself a cup of tea and then probably something would be freed up. So, I finally got a seat about 3pm and got out of there after 6pm. It went very smoothly with my new port. The needle going in isn't any nicer than an IV poke, but at least you don't have to worry about whether they are going to find your vein.

The last time, I found the Neulasta shot was the worst of it. That's the one that boosts your white blood cells so you don't get so sick from the chemo. That was the one that made my shins and knees ache so bad it woke me up at night. This time I took a Claritin the day before the shot and the morning of the shot and it really hasn't bothered me as much. And the incontinence isn't so bad either, or maybe I'm just prepared with my Poise pads this time.

Anyway, this time on Day 2 I feel fine -- no need for a nap. Had a lot of visitors today and ended up driving 4 hours up to Glenwood Springs for no reason (the "Look Good, Feel Better" class was of course NOT scheduled for New Year's Day but for next Friday!). But it was a lovely drive -- very pretty in the canyons this time of year -- and enjoyed Tom Waits CDs (a very acquired taste - don't rush out and buy any TW CD's without listening to them first).

Each time will be different I hear, and probably will get worse, but for now I feel lucky and blessed to have had such a lovely holiday time, and still have several days left of it!

Happy New Year to All! I'm definitely hoping for a better one than this year!